It's Not Awkward Unless You Make it Awkward

I once heard the phrase "It's not awkward unless you make it awkward" on a TV show and just loved it. So many situations in life could apply to this. However, some situations just beg for you to feel awkward BECAUSE THEY ARE.

Prime example of this type of situation: the dreaded office public bathroom. It is human nature to already feel uncomfortable about the whole human excretion process but throwing numerous people from a 60 or so person office into one 3 stall bathroom is just asking for problems.

I will now describe at least two of the many possible circumstances I deal with everday:

Situation #1: The Desperate Plea of the Innocent

The Innocent begins to pull her bathroom key off of her key fob (is that how you spell that? I really do not know) when the door already starts to open practically jamming her in the face.

The Innocent: oh hi!

Guilty Lucky Bastard: oh...hey! (insert awkward nervous laugh because they know what is about to happen to The Innocent)

The Innocent enters bathroom to a horrible wave of stink. "Damnit she would" she thinks inside her head.

The Innocent does her business then prepares to leave when....the door opens. The Innocent has now been blamed for the Guilty Lucky Bastard's business.

Situation #2: The Endless Squater

The Innocent enters the bathroom to one stall with a closed door and a visible pair of shoes. The Innocent completes her business at a usual pace when she realizes there are no movements going on in the stall next door. Hmmmm...interesting she thinks. Maybe she does hear a noise, maybe she doesn't, either way it is clear what is going on in there. She hastily dresses and washes her hands and exits as quickly as possible. Once out she releases a sigh and thinks, any longer in there and that definately would have gotten awkward. Especially since I know those shoes.