Charm City

When living in Baltimore, you always have to be on the watch out for slightly disturbing events or people. Even if you live in the “cool” areas, you could most certainly have a house full of old-school hons who may or may not be crack dealers living next door to you. I know this because I do.

A few of the things I have experienced with these people are:
1) 3 cop cars parked outside of their house for some kind of supposed “raid”
2) A girl passed out on my front steps when I left for work in the morning (who didn’t even wake up when I slammed the door shut- now thinking back on it maybe that was a good thing)
3) Numerous awkward evening encounters with the neighbors and their man friends and their man friend’s baby's mamas hanging out on their stoop (you have a baby, at a crack house…)
4) Morning salutations when I leave for work at 8:30 AM and they finish off their morning drag

Most recently my roommate and I were settled nicely in our living room watching TV when we heard a loud commotion outside. I recall that the guy was yelling something about “killing” or “I didn’t know you or who killed him.” Who knows. All I know is that it was going on for at least 10 minutes before it even occurred to me to look out the window. You see, these types of things are a common occurrence in downtown Baltimore so one's eyes and ears eventually become immune.

I came to this conclusion when my friend was visiting me and slept the night on my couch. I woke up the next morning to her already awake and looking quite scared. Turns out she was up all night listening to a drunk hobo humming chorus tunes while peeing on the outside of a townhouse across the street. Gross-I know, but I didn’t even wake up.

Anyways, I finally looked outside the other night and became glued to the window as I watched a hammered man scream up and down the street at my elderly crack-head neighbor as the local groupies watched from afar outside of the local bar-that-looks-like-a-house-but-is-really-somehow-a-bar (its sketchy). The scene ended with him slamming the door in her face and almost hitting every car on the block as he screeched away. I have to admit it was somewhat awesome. Well, since I was safe inside my house and my car wasn’t parked on that block.